Here Versus There: The Road to Indecision

As J.J. and I wearily stared out the airplane window yesterday afternoon, the brown haze of Los Angeles gradually replaced the blue skies we'd been rocketing through for the last ten hours, and with that we knew our journey to Europe was really at an end. It was bittersweet; coming home is always like that. We were leaving England behind, and the ridiculous ways of the British and their crazy spelling, strange food and odd accents. While it was different, it was a nice escape from the hectic Los Angeles life.

Would we be better off if we were doing our show overseas? Of course we discussed it. The nice thing about what we do is we can do it anywhere. We did the show on an airplane for cryin' out loud. We did it on trains, in pubs, and walking across the Tower Bridge in the pouring rain on a Saturday night. It's mobile, and in that way we can give you, the listener, the same experience, whether or not we're in the same time zone.

One distinction we made between Los Angeles and Britain was the ability to approach random people and talk to them. We did this with Elaine and her posse on a train returning from Edinburgh. J.J., in a surprising show of confidence, ran through the rain on a bridge to interview three drunk Germans. The frivolous nature of it all made it exciting because it was unexpected. Now if we were to attempt the same thing here in the states, we might be greeted with guns, knives, or even throwing stars if we were in China Town. Are those Chinese? I think so.

On the other hand, L.A. is familiar. We know where to go (Burbank) and where to avoid going (anywhere outside of Burbank,) we know what the traffic is like (just stay home, it's easier,) we know the weather (three days of rain, 362 days of boiling sunshine and temperatures so hot you could set a pan of raw cake mix on your front lawn at 3 AM and be blowing out the candles by 3:05.) And, of course, work is here. I know what you're thinking. 'Andrew,' you're saying to yourself, 'you are unemployed. What difference does work make?' To you I say, 'pipe down, you sound like my mother trying to convince me to move back home and live in the basement.' Why she would stamp her parenting skills a success when her grown son is living in the basement is beyond me. Mom, if you're reading this, send money.

What's the future of the show? Who knows. Maybe it's L.A. Maybe it's Europe. Maybe, assuming my letter to NASA goes answered, it's the Andrew and J.J. pod on the International Space Station. Regardless of where we end up with this crazy experiment, just know we'll always be doing it for you. And you. Not so much you because you're kind of annoying and I don't really care what you think, but we're doing it for your friend so tell her.

I've lost track of what I was saying. I'm going to take my segue for a ride down at the beach. You can't do that in England. Then again it's impossible to look cool on a segue in the first place, which is why no one in England is dumb enough to own one.